How to get your dating confidence back

August 11, 2017

One of the hardest things about dating is that your confidence can often take a beating if you let it. There is usually a fair amount of rejection flying around which can make you feel bad about yourself. At the same time, people with loads of confidence are often considered the most attractive and sexiest people. So with this in mind, here are some steps for getting your dating confidence back.

  1. Let bad experiences go

You’ve had some bad experiences in the past with online dating, right? To be honest, most people have. But it’s what you do next that counts. You can either let those bad dating experiences go on to define your dating journey or you can shrug them off, put them behind you and move on with a spring in your step and a positive attitude.


  1. Remind yourself why you’re so brilliant

Sometimes we need to take time out of our busy lives to remind ourselves why we’re so brilliant/cool/funny/attractive etc. Spend 10 minutes writing down all the things that make you uniquely, wonderfully you. Focus on the things you’re proud of and happy with, the things that you want to celebrate about being you. Take note of any areas in your life where you’re really struggling to feel like this. If you feel over weight and out of sorts, then take the decision that you want to improve this. Don’t overthink it, just take action. You want to get to a place where you feel brilliant about yourself.


  1. Push yourself

The quickest road to growing in confidence is to push yourself out of that comfort zone you’re living in. Life is nice and easy when you don’t push yourself but it doesn’t give you that incredible buzz that you get when you do. That feeling is so good! Pushing out your comfort zone will probably scare the hell out of you… but then the feeling when you succeed is fantastic. It’s addictive. Try and commit to doing something once a day, week or month that pushes you and you’ll find it boosts your confidence to  whole, new levels of brilliance.


  1. Back yourself 100%

Another quick way to build confidence is to back yourself 100%. This means every time you make a decision, you know you’re doing the right thing.  Don’t look to others for validation, just know that you’ll do the right thing for you. Your confidence will soar once you know you can rely on yourself and you don’t need to worry about what others think of you. You know you’re brilliant and lovely and that’s what counts. When you next get rejected, you won’t even entertain the thought that it’s your fault – you’ll just know that you weren’t right for them but that’s OK. You’ll be right for the right one. It only takes one, after all.

  1. Fake it till you make it

Any article focusing on boosting confidence, should most definitely include this little gem – fake it til you make it. You don’t need to be at the top of your game before you go on a date, you can just give the illusion that you are. It amounts to the same thing as far as your date is concerned. They will see the you that you’re projecting so you might as well make sure you’re projecting the best version of you, whether it’s real or not. The secret is, if you do it enough times, it becomes real.

The only way to get better and more confident on dates is to just go out on dates. Keep putting yourself out there. As you go on more dates, you’ll find you start to take it in your stride, you’ll become an old-hand at it. Your confidence will start to soar.

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